"Mulan" Review: A visually dazzling illusion masking a mostly heartless attempt to remake the classic original.

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By Quinn Marcus

(2020)

Genre: Action/Adventure

Age: 10+

55/100: Sour

Mulan was written by Rick Jaffa, Amanda Silver, Elizabeth Martin and Lauren Hynek, and was directed by Niki Caro. Based upon the legendary myth, Mulan tells the story of young protagonist Mulan, who disguises herself as a man in order to join the army in her father’s stead, as her father is unfit for war. Meanwhile, the Huns begin their purge through China, burning villages, killing any one who gets in their way, just to get to the emperor. Ever heard of the word “disappointed?” Ya, it’s a word I discovered after watching this very average Disney remake. I was in high spirits waiting for the day I would get to see Mulan on Disney+ for…30 bucks! That’s right, we bought this movie, and at first, I was okay with it, after finishing, I wanted the money back. Let me explain. Back in the good old days of my childhood (not too long ago actually) I was a wee little boy. I was having a jolly good day, playing with my favorite stuffed animal in my hometown of Gluffenshtein (Weston, Connecticut). Stupidly, I decided to toss my toy far, far away. It landed in a paper shredder, and my favorite thing to play with was torn to pieces. Whether this actually happened or not, that’s for you to guess. Anyways, the original Mulan is that stuffed animal, and the paper shredder is whoever wrote that script, in case you haven’t figured that out yet. This film was like seeing my favorite animated Disney film being destroyed right in front of me. However, not all is bad, there were some salvaged bits and pieces here and there of what once was a great kids film. So, let’s get started with my flaws, shall we?

The heartfelt messages. Wait, what are those again? Didn’t Disney films used to have profound, sentimental messages that people actually cared about? Maybe I’m just crazy, or maybe Mulan just had none. This is a movie I didn’t care about, the characters, the story, the feeling of the whole film was just so dull that I had no emotions while watching. They were obviously going for the same themes as the original, but it just didn’t work this time around. The editing. A lot of the editing in this movie was extremely choppy and didn’t always flow with previous shots. There were some cool scenes that I will talk about later, but many scenes, especially the action sequences, had questionable editing. Mulan gets a makeover? That’s right, throughout the entire time she’s disguised as a boy, she looks super dirty, when she reveals that she’s a woman in an epic battle, her face is perfect, and her hair is not messed up at all. It was very obvious when she rode onto screen. I guess this was a big “me too” moment, but it seemed so artificial and forced.

The dialogue. The script was basically people just saying things on camera. Not to mention, there were some very disturbing scenes such as when Mulan bathes in the water and the soldier boy gets naked, walks in, talks for about ten seconds and then walks out. Whoever wrote that scene had something on their mind, and it wasn’t to make a good scene, if you know what I mean. They tried to go for some form of comedy, but every other character seemed like a pawn compared to her. I literally faked laughing while watching whatever the hell those comedic scenes were. Let me pull up an example. “I like my woman buxom, with strong wide hips. Ha…ha…ha” This is true comedic inspiration, take this incredible scene to note, young writers. I miss Mushu guys, I really miss Murphy and his hysterical voice acting. If only he was there to save the day. The romance in the film existed? I actually couldn’t tell whether or not they wanted a compelling romantic subplot in this movie, she obviously likes this one soldier, but they have like two scenes together. Another thing that bothered me was the soundtrack. If you’re going to go in with no songs in a remake of Mulan, you at least need the heart pounding score. Nope, instead what we got was a generic, underused soundtrack that didn’t matter to me in the least. 

Alright, writing those negatives was a workout, what about the positives? The film is absolutely gorgeous. The cinematography by Mandy Walker was spellbinding to watch. The landscapes were amazing, the uses of green, blue, orange and gold, outstanding, and some of the camerawork required a lot of skill. The directing was pretty solid. Niki Caro knows how to direct a good action scene, all of the battles actually looked pretty cool despite the editing. I didn’t really mind the fact that she had powers, I loved scenes like when she runs up the side of the wall and kicks some ass. Sure it made her feel a little less human, but it was powerful to watch. The choreography was incredible. Whoever trained the cast to perform those sword skills and kung fu moves really put in the work to make it seem authentic. I was (mostly) entertained the whole way through. The film had just enough entertaining fight scenes to keep me a little bit interested, the final battle was fun. Overall, it's a decent popcorn flick, but I wouldn’t recommend it to fans of the original. A dull, unfaithful, beautiful, entertaining new entry from the likes of Disney, this is what I saw in Mulan

The cast of Mulan had some standouts, but was overall not too good. Yifei Liu played Mulan like a blank slate, she was very athletic in the film, but her emotion was super bland. Mulan is a character that we, the audience should care about and root for. However, her performance screamed, “I’m capable, but have the likability of a block of wood.” Donnie Yen was a total badass in this film, loved him in Rogue One, loved him in this. In fact the whole training part I actually enjoyed. He was probably the most committed to his role, it may not have been a huge part, but when he was on screen, I almost clapped. 

Mulan is more mature than the original film. It has its fill of action, stabbing, sword fights, explosions. Some off screen nudity, but not much romance. No language whatsoever, just a lot of shouting. The villain is a little scary, I guess. Mulan’s character is strong and very independent, a great role model. The message is be brave and...um, loyal, and don’t listen to the matchmaker. If she finds an “auspicious” match, you’re in trouble.

$KIP IT, $TREAM IT OR $PLURGE IT?

I SAY…$KIP IT!